Pub's open for business!

[georgeg]

Dont think so Benji..wee Alky an Alkapops cousin is Gesa Weenip..ane da pies frae da city bakers in Paisley toon.. nae doot they.l change thur supplier noo dat ave telt you..av been banned twice, so da think am a troublemaker...bit am no really..jist a wee bit senile... ;D ;D ;D

[benjiesmum]

Of course he is! Silly me! Must have got him mixed up with someone else george!!! Now I come to think of it I think Ivor Weedram has got another cousin up near Oban - he runs the local clockmakers. I think his name is Justin Tyme......or was it Big Ben McClockan??? You know the one with the knobbly knees?

George, here's me thinking that the pies would be local. I had visions of Mrs Pastry and her trainee chef Cindy Oven making the pies in her wee old fashioned bakery, all lined up on great big trays, full of gravy rich and dark and the crusts all golden brown and the meat, real Shetland beef hung for at least three weeks, all meltin' in your mouth and all. The smell of those pies wafting down the high street.......along with freshly baked bread so sweet and yeasty....but no, I'm getting carried away......... ;D

Don't they get a bit stale by the time they come up from Paisley town - sorry toon!!!

[Admin Mal]

Benjiesmum, what a time you've had! Hope things have quietened down a bit now. Congratulations on the inspection - well done! I think the pies in the pub are usually made locally with good local produce, but occasionally they have to use alternative suppliers so sometimes they are Paisley pies or even Dundee pehs!

[mucklelaalie]

dirs no paets fir da fire...

better make it two doubles den..... in the same glass.....

on da upside (well maybe a doon side)... i've written a brand spanking new piano piece/tune, written about home... home being Northmavine and unsuprisingly i've called it 'Northmavine'. It is one of the best two i have written to date... thought it better be good considering the place its about! It goes... *you'll have to use your imagination here...*

I'll record it sometime no doubt... i'll play it on da pub 'piano', virtually, until den Onywye

[benjiesmum]

Yikes - I thought there was no tunes allowed on Sunday nights!!! And if you'd looked, the virtual peats are round by the side of the virtual pub - typical bloke unless they are where he can trip over them, he can't find them. Why do you think that is? I have this trouble with my husband all the time.

Mind you, the last one out should have stoked it up a bit. You know that the young 'uns are still up and about when some of us "more senior" are a bed!!

Sorry, I missed your tune NortOwer, no doubt I'll catch it again! ;D I bet it sounded good with all those drams inside you before you started!

[Pat]

Mornin Benjiesmum

I thought I was in da pub early but phew 5.30 am Good to have you by though and glad you're OK after all that terrible weather!

The paet stack is lasting well. I suppose that's because nobody kens that it's roond the side. Da paet kishie is foo da day though an da fire lighted for George ti toast his toes at. ;D

[georgeg]

Some carry on in da Maggnie last night..When I went in, Alky brought ower mae gless o watter, an sat doon wae me, en she telt me hur brass necklace wis broken, I telt hur tae take it aff an spread it oot on da bar..ah said I would be right on the job en a second,,but hur sister Alkapop [ who.s a bit deaf ] misstook da conversation an thought I ment something else.she grabbed ma gless an skelped me ower da heed wae it,, to say I wis shocked en stunned wis an understatement., a wis mair like unconsious.. a burd came in da pub wae hur man. she wis wearing an odd thing round hur neck, a think it wis a whiplash an hur fellows face wis covered in plasters think he took a few Nicks wen shaving..she phoned da cop shop in Lerwick Toon and telt dem ta send da Black Maria, they said they didna huv wan but would send a panda,[ why they call dem that I dont know cause they dont look anything like bears ].. anyway they came an lifted Alkapop, she wis shoutin tae dem dat it wis a missunderstanding, dat she wis a bit deaf an missheard me....think she is up afore da beak next week.. so we will huv ta wait an see whit happens tae hur... ;D ;D ;D

[benjiesmum]

This pub's getting a bit "rough" isn't it. Who hired those two or are they just filling in 'til the right staff get here?? Poor, helpful George seems to have landed himself right in it. so now they'll be short staffed and all!

Showing your age though George ;D - I don't think they've had Black Marias since the days of the "Lavender Hill Mob" and The Titchfield Thunderbolt" (oops I'm showing my age now!) I thought panda cars were consigned to history too. Aren't they still called jam butty cars nowadays??? I think you'd better stay clear of those two trouble makers. Hope you are alright - perhaps Alky was a bit foo!!!!
And I think the police car you may have needed was attending to the BIT OF A BUMP somewhere else on the island!!!

Now, Pat, if you were wondering why I was so early in the pub - it's nothing to do with my craving for alcohol - I just like to have a quick keek at what's going on when I am eating my porridge in the morning!

......and the reason I popped in was to tell you all it was snowing here this morning (well I could see it on the Pennines and round school this morning) but I've just been to the Market Cross in Lerwick AND IT'S SNOWING THERE TOO!!!!!

[mrgluss]

Oh isn it fine ta be inside by da fire on a night lik dis. Joost back fae Lerwick an in need o a neeb (snooze) wi a gless o da best hoose white. Thank goodness it's quietened doon since George wis in earlier (George you certainly seem to have a wye wi da barmaids ). Nortower - let wis keen whin doo gets da Nortmavine piece recorded so we can get it pittn on da jukebox. It's a bit quiet in herewithoot music.

[georgeg]

Hi. Mrgluss. its nice an quite da night..I notice Alky da barmaids off da night,,its probably stress, whos da new barmaid, looks familiar, I think its Fifi frae da shetlink forum, she must have relocated tae Northmavine.. anyway iam getting da drinks what are you all having...whit do you mean Fifi, you dont except Northmavine twentys, an here I printed thousands o dem..ok Mrgluss pit dem on da fire............. ;D ;D ;D

[georgeg]

SPOOKIE STORY.... went to the magnie last night and sat down with the regulars, Mrgluss Nortower Benji Heimdal Pat and others..after a few drams o water I thought I would tell them a wee [[[ True Story. ]]] of my encounter with an unexplained event in my life, many years ago..This is one of three [[[ True ]]] accounts...Fifi could we all have another round please, and have one yourself..before I start, Mhay, where are you off too..I havent even started yet..Its late now, I wonder if FiFI could lock the door first, and turn down the lights, thanks Fifi. we should be ok drinking after hours, I heard that their was a riot at the Northern Lights in Brae, so the local constabulary should be busy there..
Right this ghost story. as I said. is 100% true...When I was quite young, I was a timed served joiner by trade, and was lucky to get a contract with a local confectionary company..after a while I became like a trusted friend to the director and his two sons, and did a lot of work in their homes..now Sandy the eldest son bought an old mansion, which used to belong to the Robertsons of Paisley [[ Robertsons Jam Factory ]] you old ones may remember the goll---g badges you got with the jam jars of marmalade..Anyway Mr and Mrs Robertson had died, he first, then a few years later, his wife died, hence the mansion was sold..So I had to do a few things for Sandy in this house, which was empty at this time..When you went in the front door, you entered into a large square hall with many doors leading off it..one of the doors led into a kind of parlour, in front of you was a most beautiful old staircase leading up to the bedrooms and a lounge..The house was empty as I said earlier, and I was working in the parlour, I was fitting shelves as I remember it ...when I felt the atmosphere change, and then the hairs on the back of my neck started to rise up.. I was really startled, but quite calm, I looked back at the door entrance, and saw a very old lady shuffling past, heading to the staircase.. She was very small, about five feet, her grey hair was tied in a bun, both hands were clasped in front of her, she was wearing what I thought was an old night gown, kind of green in colour with a pattern on it..I stepped down from the stepladder I was on , wondering who she was, and how she got in the house.. but when I looked out of the doorway, towards the staircase..she had vanished into thin air...real spookie..another day I might tell you about another happening in the same house..OOOOOHHH. Where is every one gone..iam oot o here fast.... ;D ;D

[Pat]

EEEEeeerrie can't wait for the next story george. "We're doomed, doomed I tell ye!"

[georgeg]

he.he. Glad you liked the story Pat.. it is all true..another short story.. also true.. I might tell you about, in the same house, when I was struck in the back by an invisible being..wonder where all the regulars disappeared to last night..when I left, I thought I heard an noise like stampeding feet running down the road.. ;D

[benjiesmum]

You'll have to buy everyone doubles, George, to calm them down. ;D I like a good ghost story - especially when they're true!! And that's a good 'un!!

I've got a few "little" stories but nothing I've experienced myself - except a flying glass once. But, my friend over the road told me of her experience in her garden. Now, if you knew my friend, you would know that she is very matter-of-fact, no nonsense, isn't sentimental doesn't believe in ghosts, horoscopes, fairies, Father Christmas or any such things......

She and her husband had built a new house behind the old stone farmhouse which they had been required to demolish. Where the stone farmhouse had stood was now a large lawn.

......one day she was mowing the lawn. It was the middle of the day................

As she busied herself in the garden, she was aware that someone was watching her. She stopped what she was doing momentarily and saw a man standing looking right through her (as I'm telling you this I've got goosebumps all over and my eyes are watering!!!) She watched him for a few seconds, smiled at him and greeted him cheerily but got no response.

He appeared to be very over-dressed for a summer's day - even for a farmer - which, at first, she took him to be. Then she realised that he had a very big army coat on, and had something like a bag slung over his shoulder and an army hat. She turned back to her lawn mower to stop it............aaaaaahhhhhhh......and when she turned back to speak to him..........he had disappeared.

When she made enquiries about who had lived in the old farm in the past, she discovered that the son of the house had gone away to the first world war. He should have taken over the farm......but, sadly never lived to return.

She is convinced that it was him she saw that day. She's never seen him since, but tells me she sometimes feels a presence there when she is in the garden.

I'm so terrified that if I have to go over there at night I take my million watt torch with me!!! ;D

Now, where's that double brandy??

[georgeg]

hi. Benji.. I really enjoyed that account o events..because I had a similar experience when out fishing in the Ayrshire countryside..but I will save it for another story on this thread,,this one was a bit unnerving though, and left me shivering and with a feeling of dread........